No one can own someone else’s sexuality. You, alone, have complete sovereignty over your’s, and we must always honor the sexual sovereignty of another…….regardless of whether we are in intimate relationship with that person. Just as kings and queens rule their domains we have jurisdiction over who we allow into our intimate world. Two or more people can make agreements around their sexual behavior, regardless of those commitments, no one own another’s sexuality.
Honoring the sexual sovereignty of all, and particularly your lover, allow for the trust and safety required to go deep into relationship. Without that trust and safety, one or both parties to the relationship will hold back either physically and/or emotionally. With the respect, trust and safety in place, two and go very deeply together, touch places that allow us to open and grow in way unavailable to the soloist. This is why in Tantric Buddhism, consort practice is considered the most powerful and profound path to touch enlightenment.
Artwork by Anna Perenna