If you are wondering how to hook up and have casual sex with women, you need to know that many aren’t really into fly-by-night flings.
Why? They are told from a young age they might be “used” for sex. So they are constantly on the lookout for those subtle signals.
Here’s how you can alleviate her worries – while letting her know you just want to have sex and are not looking for a serious relationship.
How to Have a Fling Without Getting Hurt
No matter your gender – knowing how to have casual sex without getting hurt or hurting the other party is paramount. A good guideline is not seeing any of your lovers more than once a week.
While rules like these don’t work for everyone, they can be helpful if you are just looking for something casual. It’s therefore a good idea to actively avoid situations that can create close attachments, such as monogamy and frequent rendezvous.
Even if you follow the rules around how to have a casual relationship without getting hurt, it doesn’t guarantee you won’t experience these feelings. If you do get hurt or hurt someone, instead of avoiding or shaming those feelings, the best thing to do is acknowledge and feel them.
Hookup Rules
1. Honesty
Number one on the list of hookup rules is to be clear early on in the connection that you are not looking for anything serious. It is helpful to reassure her that casual does not mean disconnected or uncaring.
2. Respect
One of the biggest hookup rules is to respect the person or people you are sleeping with. For a woman to feel respected, you need to look in her eyes, listen to her, tell her about your positive feelings towards her, and pay attention to her desires and boundaries. Women want verbal reassurance more than anything else.
3. Don’t Talk about Other Women
Unless they have explicitly told you they get turned on by hearing about your other partners, refrain from talking about the other women in your life. (Acceptable exceptions, of course, are your mother, sister, daughter, or any other family member.)
Don’t swoon about how special other women are to you. And don’t give her an opportunity to measure herself up against these other women. This will definitely detract her from feeling special.
4. Don’t Compare Her to Your Other or Former Lovers
Most men are aware they shouldn’t compare their current partner to a past lover. Yet some of them are still making this mistake. One of the worst examples happens around sex when men say things like, “All of my other partners have had orgasms with me.”
First of all – probably not. Many women fake it to make their partners feel good. Secondly – who cares? If you are sleeping with a woman, you need to find out what gives her pleasure. And not make her feel inadequate and less special than her predecessors.
Even if you are dating multiple people and are being honest with your partner, it’s better to keep the details about your experiences with others to a minimum.
How to Seduce a Woman with Words
You might look at a woman with passion, treat her well, and put lots of energy into making her feel good sexually. The non-verbal ways you tell a woman she’s special allow her body to relax and trust you. Yet it is still possible for her mind to make up all sorts of negative stories. If you really want her to feel amazing, you need to learn how to seduce a woman with words.
First – choose your words carefully. Don’t spill them all out at once. Try expressing yourself in short, direct sentences. Second – surprise her with your thoughtfulness about who she really is, what’s important to her, and what you find particularly compelling about her.
How to Seduce a Woman with Words Examples
Whether your experience with a woman lasts one night or many years – you should frequently let her know the positive impact she is having on you. The words you use to express her importance to you can be as simple as, “Your laugh is infectious” or as profound as, “You inspire me.”
The most important thing is that you truly feel them in the moment you share them. Only authentic words will really affirm your feelings to her. Here’s a list of examples you can use to seduce a woman with words:
- I’m so impressed by you
- Our last time together was so hot
- I love how passionate you are about….(your work, creating the life you want, your family, helping people, etc.)
- You are such a badass
- I am really enjoying our time together
- Something about her appearance that isn’t necessarily overtly sexual like – “Your long hair is so magnificent” or “You have the most beautiful hands”
Get Some Help From a Sex Coach
While these are some helpful examples, it is not just what you say – but the way you say it.
Finding the right tone can often be challenging – luckily, there are sex coaches who can help you learn how to verbalize in authentic and sexy ways.
